Memo
to: Baby Boomers,
It is time for you to retire. Do you understand that because you fail to retire you are setting of a chain of economical issues that are sure to affect us for the next 20 years. Let me break it down for you because clearly you DON’T get it. (step 1 leads to step 2, etc.)
1. Economy: The bottom fell out during the years of the Bush. Stocks dropped. Spending stopped. Companies flopped.
2. Baby Boomers: You lost ½ of your 401k and retirement income so now you think you need to stay at work longer because 1) you need to build your money back up and 2) your 20 year old children are dependent on you because *GASP* they have yet to find a job post college and have thousands upon thousands in student loans.
3. Recent grads can’t find jobs because job opportunities are limited. Why are they limited? Because baby boomers won’t FREAKING retire. Now the few jobs that are available are taken by those with 10-30+ years of experience. In these trying times what HR representative would hire a recent graduate with intern experience over someone with 10-20+ years. (yes it’s true- Those with more experience are now competing in lower-end jobs because they are looking for ANYTHING that will help them pay the bills).
4. So Mom and Dad, here is the synopsis. The reason why your recent graduates stay at home longer, mooching off of you is because you and your MASSIVE baby boomer co-workers won’t MOVE THE HECK OUT THE WAY. Here’s my poem.
It is time for you to retire. Do you understand that because you fail to retire you are setting of a chain of economical issues that are sure to affect us for the next 20 years. Let me break it down for you because clearly you DON’T get it. (step 1 leads to step 2, etc.)
1. Economy: The bottom fell out during the years of the Bush. Stocks dropped. Spending stopped. Companies flopped.
2. Baby Boomers: You lost ½ of your 401k and retirement income so now you think you need to stay at work longer because 1) you need to build your money back up and 2) your 20 year old children are dependent on you because *GASP* they have yet to find a job post college and have thousands upon thousands in student loans.
3. Recent grads can’t find jobs because job opportunities are limited. Why are they limited? Because baby boomers won’t FREAKING retire. Now the few jobs that are available are taken by those with 10-30+ years of experience. In these trying times what HR representative would hire a recent graduate with intern experience over someone with 10-20+ years. (yes it’s true- Those with more experience are now competing in lower-end jobs because they are looking for ANYTHING that will help them pay the bills).
4. So Mom and Dad, here is the synopsis. The reason why your recent graduates stay at home longer, mooching off of you is because you and your MASSIVE baby boomer co-workers won’t MOVE THE HECK OUT THE WAY. Here’s my poem.
Ode to Old People
Baby boomers won’t retire
Recent grads can’t get hired
Recent grads stay at home
Recent grads default on school loans
Recent grads can’t buy homes
Banks can no longer function alone
Government decides to lends them money
Taxes go up for everybody
Economy won’t go up
Recent grads still out of luck
Recent grads apply at Target
While waiting for a better job market
Recent grads goes back to school
Pays more money like a fool
20 years now have passed
Baby Boomers depart in masse
Who is there to take their place?
My five degrees can’t replace
The work experience you’ve snatched away
2 comments:
Snaps!
This sums up the bitter pill I've been chewing lately. Awesome job!
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