Morning Musings


The Kiamsha newsletter is going to be bomb! I love doing it because I love the layout and look of it! It's coming out tommorow. Visit our blog, KORE to take a peak.
So I need to stop myself from reading a specific blog that shall remain nameless. The posts and the commentors are so far twisted from being spiritually and morally correct that I begin to feel like a prude. NO, they are wrong! not me. The blog covers topics such as waiting 90 days before sex. Some people comment that- that's too long and they would opt to have j.o.'s on the side while waiting. WHAT? Forget the spiritual requirement to wait until marriage, these fools can't wait 90 days?!?!? Other topics that bothered me where concerning pre-nups, etc. It's not really the post perse that bothers me. It is the collective mindset of the commentors.

To be clear, I actually liked the blog. The blogger wrote exceptionally well and posted numerous descriptive stories that I ate up. But lately, I just can't do it anymore. Everything is not for everyone! I wish her blog and her followers the best but i'm turning in my membership card.

My sister had me cracking up on the train with her modern day descriptions of the story of Moses. I'm going to paraphrase our discussion but I hope I can get this right.

J.a.c: Did you know Moses was almost killed by Pharoah?
me: What? I don't remember that. Why?
j.a.c.: because he whipped an Egyption.
me: what?
J.a.c.: yea girl. Here's what it said. Basically, Moses saw one of his fellow Hebrews being whipped by an egyption. So Moses looked left, and then looked right -- as in checking for witnesses on the sneak tip-- then proceeded get a good slash in on the egyption himself.
me: LOL. Dang, Moses was DOWN for his people!
J.a.c: True. Then later he was trying to break up a fight between two Hebrews hommies and one of them was like. 'So what? You gonna beat me like you beat the egyption?' Moses was like, what? Somebody must have peeped me and the word got out!! It's all over the streetz now.
me: Dang, somebody snitched?!?!
J.a.c.: yep and Pharoah must have heard so he wanted to kill him
me: Wow, that was like modern day drama

Other modern day drama from the bible.
The first baby mamma drama- For Real
Abraham's wife Sarah couldn't have a baby. So Sarah told Abraham he could have a baby with her servent girl. After the baby was born Sarah started to get salty. Adding to the problem, the servent girl started feeling herself because she had Abraham's only son. Sarah just sucked it up.

Later, God told Sarah she would concieve. At first Sarah didn't believe it because she was... well.... let's be frank... menapausal. But alas, through the power of God, she did. So Abraham now had two baby mammas, who struggled to put up with each other.

One day, the two half-brothers were playing together and the servent girls son started picking on Sarah's son. Sarah got heated and told Abraham "Uh uh- this is not happening to my son. They got to go." Abraham was like, "dang!! You really going to ask me to kick my son and his mother out on the street?" Sarah was like, "this house is not big enough for the both of us."

Abraham was stressed. Finally, God came and told him, "listen to your Sarah, she is your wife. I will take care of your son."

So Abraham did as God told him. The servent girl and her son were kicked out to the wilderness and God provided them with food and water.

**Man, let this be a lesson.



I just really don't like winey, emotional men. It makes me so disgusted that I almost gag in my mouth. I mean really, "you're turning my OFF."

I honestly just don't understand it. Like, what made you like that? LOL. It's even more difficult for me because my normal personality is not winey and emotional. Yea, I get like that sometimes in different cirmcumstances but not on the regular. It's not my personality, so it's just so hard for me to put up with. WHY ARE YOU A MARSHMELLOW AND I'M NOT????? Cut the mess and get a backbone.

To be honest, I don't like that trait in girls either. Honestly, it could just be my "problem." My family always says that i'm mean and my boyfriend says that sometimes I lack that female mushiness. But so what? I can show proper compassion when the situation calls for it; if you're sincerely feeling down, if your team is officially out of the NCAA tournament, etc. but if its something stupid and/or it's just your normal personality, I'm just too through. Miss me with that and go on to the next person.

eh, that enough.


Falling head over heels


So, I'm in love.

I remember this dude from Degrassi. lol. I didn't pay him no mind. LOL. But to be fair to myself, I fell in love with his music first. I didn't even know this was the same person.

However, he said (and I'm paraphrasing) 'he looks at himself as a product, which he has to because when he comes on the stage the ladies have to swoon.' Somthing to that affect. If he gets a big head, my love will fade. DON'T let that happen please!! cuz I want to be down for him.
Eh, that's it.

Shhhh it's on the low

Us with our girl

T Fans for Lyfe

So, I heard or rather read a rumor that Teedra Moses' album Young Lioness is out there -- somewhere. It's just on the low because I guess issues with the label and it coming out. She always claimed it was indefinitely postponed. WELL, some people have heard it! And I am supposed to be a part of that group who has.

MAAAAN, I'm on a mission. I'm gonna find it if I gotta call Teedra herself. If you have any clues, send them my way. If you don't get out of the way!


Hello World

Today is the first day of the start of my new life. I feel like i'm in a rebirth stage and its totally necessary. When i re-emerge, I will be beautiful. Wish me luck. But right now, I just need to erase and start again from scratch.

Stage of Metamorphasis

Pupa: The Transition Stage
When the caterpillar is full grown and stops eating, it becomes a pupa. The pupa of butterflies is also called a chrysalis.
Depending on the species, the pupa may suspended under a branch, hidden in leaves or buried underground. The pupa of many moths is protected inside a coccoon of silk.
This stage can last from a few weeks, a month or even longer. Some species have a pupal stage that lasts for two years.
It may look like nothing is going on but big changes are happening inside. Special cells that were present in the larva are now growing rapidly. They will become the legs, wings, eyes and other parts of the adult butterfly. Many of the original larva cells will provide energy for these growing adult cells.



My favorite Fmylife moments: Enjoy

Today, I went to the gym with two of my friends expecting to pay a guest fee but the cute guy working at the front desk let me in for free. On the way out after working out I started to flirt with him and he said "Don't flatter yourself, I just let you in because I'm lazy." FML

Today, a co-worker and I walked out of our office at the same time. He got in his car, which was parked right out front. I asked him what I had to do to get a sweet parking spot like that. He proceeded to roll up his pant leg and show me his prosthesis. He was in the handicapped spot. FML

Today, I was at my friends house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girl if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dial my number and look down to find she has my number is saved in her phone as ASS FACE #3. FML

Today, I got up extra early to curl my hair because I wanted to look nice at school for a change. After coming downstairs my mom yells at me and says, "See, when you don't wake up on time your hair looks like that. You could have atleast combed it!" FML

Today, I got a phone call from a detective in response to my stolen car that has been missing since St. Patrick's Day. He told me that he had found my car, but was chuckling the whole time. Turns out, I had parked my car in a different lot. I haven't had it for a week. It was never stolen. FML

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

Today, I suggested that my mother download Skype so we could video chat while I'm studying in London over the summer. After I had explained how it worked and that it was free, she said "Well...you'll only be gone for a few months. It's not really worth it." FML

Today, I decided to start working out because my friends said I'm scrawny and weak. I bought an expensive giant container of protein powder to take before during work outs. I wasn't strong enough to open the lid. FML

Today, I saw my boyfriend for the last time for two years. When we got back from dinner, we sat in his truck for a little while to talk. A few minutes later, my mom comes flying out of my house screaming, "Satan is here, and he is tempting you!" That is the last memory he will have of me. FML

some of these I feel really bad about. Boy, this was funny but now its depressing me........... LMBO

Boy on the Metro

The boy in front of me on the subway train keeps his eyes pointed at the ground. His ripped army fatigued shoulder slung backpack exposes three binders and numerous pages of schoolwork thrown carelessly in between. Although he wears jordans they are team jordans. Symbolic of the fact that he tries to fit in but doesn't quite make it. His blue and grey plaid shirt covers a blue polo shirt that creeps up his neck to his thick unshapped hairline. while he readjusts himself, trying to find a " cool" stance and comfortable position against the poll, I want to scream, HAVE CONFIDENCE in yourself. He can't be any older than 14 and I see many of the insecurities that I used to have in his unsure gaze. If I could somehow magically impart to him everything I know now it would change his whole life or atleast allow him to avoid many uncomfortable moments, missed opportunities, missed fun, and regrets. Only if I could tell him get a shape up and atleast fake it till you make it. If I could just tell him to hold on becasue sooner rather than later most of those insecurities will fade away. Only if I could have known at 14 what I know at 23!! Only if I could spare him!!

Do you have confidence. Take the test http://www.theconfidentclub.com/calculator/index.htm

I got a 36


Its Pay Day BAYBAY

I hope they got my timesheets over there. I faxed them in but the fax machine over here is sketchy. EEK!!! Hopefully, when I go over there today (I work 2 blocks from my contracting company) they will have my dough!!!

My version of RanDumb thoughts (I'm not a swagger jacker (j.a.c's blog) but I just had to today... Just a little bit)

I need to get my ticket. I'm going to Oklahoma in April and the Bahamas the first week of June. All this money is going out but all these bills just keep coming in.
Today, I think I'm going to ask someone out on a date. Any ideas of fun things to do?
Did I mention it was payday!!
I need a new good book to get me through the day. I started and finished one on Wednesday, I mean it was trash but I needed something on the train.
I forgot my headphones so no music today. My music isn't suitable to be played even on low tones because Pandora can throw some unexpected songs in the mix and obviously an Ipod without headphones just won't work.

I just need it to warm up outside. Just till the point when I don't have to wear these dang stockings. Or to the point when as I come up from the metro, I don't have to bite back the chill that runs through me.

Today, my co-worker said, "its just one of those days, huh." What? "Is it that transparent on my face," I asked. She said, "yep." I didn't get home till 12am last night and then had a serious discussion on the phone afterwards. Its going to be a rough one. Maybe I'll do a happy hour after this. That could be a good date right?

Eh, that's enough.


He Apologized Today (whatever)

I know that's really big for him (rolling my eyes) but at this point is it a little too late? I know i'm over the issue but the fact that i'm fed up with it and really don't care anymore may be a sign that i'm over this whole "relationship." It was just too immature and didn't have a purpose.

I'm already a little wishy washy, espcially when the "relationship" is long distance. After weeks - and months in my case- of separation, I tend to "get over" missing the significant other which in essence is the same process of "getting over" a break up. So when he comes home it's essential that I see him in order to reinvigorate my commitment to the "relationship." Well, days passed and that has not happened, and now, I really have no drive or desire to make it happen.

I didn't apologize for anything, because its not my fault and I always apologize just to smooth things over. So in essence, I could apologize for "any miscommunication on my part" but thats a bull sh&* apology without any meaning or substance and I just don't feel like smoothing his ego over.

It's Tuesday. He's got four more days in town. Lets see if he comes to me because i think that's the only way its going to work at this point.

c'est la vie.

I think i'm going to do this

CAREER FAIR On Monday, March 23rd, the Washington Wizards will present the Sports and Entertainment Career Fair. This Fair will give you the chance to meet with representatives from the best sports & entertainment companies in the Washington, DC area! Companies will be looking to fill full-time, part-time, and internship positions. The career fair will take place at Verizon Center from 2:00-4:30pm, each ticket costs $25 which includes admission to the career fair and an upper level ticket to the Wizards vs. Bulls game that night at 7pm! Click here to purchase tickets. http://www.verizoncenter.com/news/employment.shtml

I think I may actually go to this. I can go on my lunch break. Anyone who know me knows that I am desperatly seeking an "in" in the field of entertainment PR. I'm at a crossroads in my professional life right now and deciding whether to pursue my Teach for America contract or follow my passion in media and entertainment. This is a big decision and I have yet to make it. Currently, I am working on both, studying like CRaZY for the Praxis Teaching Certification exam, and networking, searching and applying for jobs/internships. This is all while in graduate school, working full time, completing my Kiamsha responsibilities and church. Whew!

The ball game at 7pm sounds nice. I think I will go by myself. It's in the upper seats and I will get some popcorn and go after work. I work right next to the verizon center. I am literally looking out my window at huge poster of Gilbert A. right now. And I don't have any commitments on Monday night, except Kiamsha, which I can miss.

I'm thinking about taking a board position at Teens Express - its a non-profit organization that works to foster the artistic creativity and skills of youth interested in performing arts. Thats cool. I mean I have done my share of performing in plays like "Our Town" "You're A Good Man Charlie Brown" "Peter Pan" and of course "Kiamsha" and singing has always been my thing. The only thing I can't do is dance, and thats funny because i've been dancing from the age of 4 all the way through senior year of high school.

But anyway Teens Express is similar in nature to Rush Philanthropic, which is dedicated to providing disadvantaged urban youth with significant arts exposure, access and education as well as providing exhibition opportunities to early and mid-career artists and artists of color.
Rush Philanthropic believes that if you give young people the opportunity to practice and appreciate art—whether poetry, music, dance or the visual arts—you will see lives transformed. Rush Philanthropic was founded by the Simmons Bros (Russell, Joe and Danny). I would LOVE to work there as well. It would be working in my field but in a positive, uplifting area.

I'm at lunch right now so i'll holla at yall later.


Morning Time Fun

I had one of those mornings that you only see in the movies.

I parked my car at the metro parking garage and began walking down to the subway station. By some coincidence, I happened to look at the back of my stockings. EEEK! To my surprise I had four or five runs creeping up the back of my leg. I ran back to the car and contemplated stripping out of my tights even though it was barely 40 degrees outside and I had on peep-toe pumps without any nail polish (a definite no no). After baring down I walked back to the metro station attempting to ignore the stares of other commuters who were obviously thinking “Is she crazy, it is not that warm outside.” Finally, the doors open and I opt to sit at the seat behind a glass barrier to hide my bare legs.

30 minutes later I finally make it to my stop and immediately began searching for a CVS downtown. I have to find some tights ASAP! I call my office because by this time I am more than 5 minutes late and ask for directions to the closest CVS. Brenda gives me some very sketchy directions to a CVS supposedly around the corner and I start off in search of it. After two or three blocks of searching without any success I decide it’s time to ask someone.

“Those are some pretty legs.”

Shoot!!! It’s the homeless man sitting outside the coffee shop drawing attention to me. I say thank you politely and attempt to move on but CAN YOU BELIEVE this man starts yelling after me shouting more “compliments.”

Ignoring him I finally spot a woman to ask directions.

“The CVS that was up this street is no longer open,” she says. “The closest CVS is on 8th and E.” I am on 5th and G. The CVS is three blocks up and two blocks over. SIGH. I turn back around and trek up the street. Once again ignoring the stares while my toes begin to freeze (remember, I am wearing peep-toe pumps).

“Those are some pretty legs.” It’s him again. “I would love, I mean do anything to sleep with those legs…….…..”

Finally, I make it to the CVS and find the perfect pair of jet-black, smooth tights. They feel great. After I purchase them I ask if there is a restroom for customers. Of course there isn’t. I head back up the street and spot a Starbucks. As I pass I remember all Starbucks have a restroom. I head straight towards it. LOCKED. Restrooms are for Starbucks customers only. So, I purchase a white chocolate mocha and grab the key. I change into my tights before leaving and throw all the extra materials I am carrying such as the CVS bag, receipt, newspaper, etc. into the trash.

Finally, I head back to my job, three blocks up and two blocks over. By this time35 minutes have passed. “Not too bad,” I say to myself while sipping my white mocha. Dang, the barrister forgot the whipped cream. Oh well. Once I reach the front of my building I search for my ID badge. Hmmm, it’s not in my pocket and definitely not in my hand. “Gosh, please don’t do this to me.” It’s not in my purse either. Just GREAT! Maybe I threw it away with the newspaper. So I head back to Starbucks….. three blocks up and two blocks over.

On the way back I take a glimpse in the dark window of the building next to me and see my reflection. Dangnabit! Are you kidding me, my hair has frizzed on the right side of my head and the right side ONLY (It is rainy and humid outside, while still being cold). I washed my hair last night and woke up extra early to flat iron it…. For nothing!!!

I make it back to the Starbucks, grab the key and dig (I mean literally, into the trash can). Nada but I do find the receipt to CVS. It has the business number on it. I grab my cell out my bag and dial…. automated. I press all the wrong options and it takes me three tries to finally reach someone. It’s there!!! Finally, a break! I head up the block back to CVS and grab my ID.

I exit CVS and begin my trek, 3 blocks down and two blocks over. It is now 9:00am. Searching for my tights took one hour. I make it my cube and plop into my seat.

“It’s Jay,” I say to my boss. “You would not believe my morning. I will come down there to tell you all about it but I just called to let you know I’m in.”


It’s only Monday.


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